“Burnout is a conflict of values between what you think is important and what your employer thinks is important.”
Explore the essential leadership qualities in the culinary world, from inspiring your team to balancing firm guidance with support, and learn how to foster resilience within your team.
In this episode of Chef Life Radio, I delve into the crucial role mindset plays in a chef’s career.
I emphasize the significance of resilience when navigating the challenges of the culinary world, from high-pressure services to unexpected menu mishaps and staff conflicts.
Key Takeaways:
Tune in to understand how emotional intelligence, resilience, and effective leadership coaching can elevate individual chefs and culinary teams.
My practical advice and personal anecdotes provide a roadmap for aspiring and seasoned chefs to thrive in the dynamic world of culinary arts.
00:00 Introduction to Chef Life Radio
Meet Chef Adam Lamb, your host and culinary career coach, as he introduces the powerful world of mindset in the culinary industry and the importance of resilience for success.
02:28 Resilience: The Old and the New
Chef Adam shares a personal story about resilience from his early days in the kitchen, highlighting the evolution of resilience from a traditional tough approach to a more flexible and adaptive mindset.
08:28 Cultivating Resilience
Learn practical strategies to cultivate resilience in kitchen challenges, including mindfulness techniques, seeking support, and reflecting on past successes to build confidence.
12:57 Leadership in the Culinary World
Explore the essential leadership qualities in the culinary world, from inspiring your team to balancing firm guidance with support, and learn how to foster resilience within your team.
Hey there, chef. This month, we're diving deep into the powerful
world of mindset. The secret ingredient behind every successful
chef's journey, get ready to unlock the mindset shifts that propel
you toward culinary greatness and redefine your path to success.
In this episode, we're gonna be talking about resilience. Maybe
you've asked yourself these questions. It's a high pressure service,
and you're wondering how you can maintain your cool and focus
during peak service hours when everybody seems to be asking you
for everything at the same time. Maybe there's a conflict between
the staff. How do I handle this conflict without losing my shit?
Maybe it's a menu mishap, something you thought was really gonna
work out well, but certainly didn't sell. And when faced with
the unexpected challenges, how can you adapt and keep the kitchen
running smoothly? We're talking about the successful chef mindset.
The kitchen's heat is not just from the stove. It's the challenges
that we face every day as chefs. Maintaining resilience in these
challenges is crucial to your success and well-being. In this
episode, I'm gonna give you 3 strategies and tips for cultivating
a successful chef mindset, and I'm also gonna give you 3 tips
on how to foster more resilience in your culinary crew. Welcome
to Chef Life Radio where we empower chefs with emotional intelligence
and leadership coaching and transform teams and cultures. I'm
your host and culinary career coach, chef Adam Lamb, and I'm committed
to helping you reclaim your passion, purpose, and process in the
kitchen. Our mission at Chef Life Radio is clear, to elevate culinary
professionals into effective leaders who excel in their craft
and cultivate thriving collaborative teams. As a seasoned culinary
career coach, I specialize in empowering chefs to thrive in their
roles through a unique blend of emotional intelligence, relationship
building skills, and communication enhancement. Join me as we
unlock your potential and create a kitchen environment where passion,
purpose, and excellence thrive. I focus on leadership development,
work life balance and wellness, professional growth, and career
advancement. For the next 4 episodes, I'm gonna be talking about
mindset, what it means, and how you can cultivate a successful
chef's mindset. If you're ready to discover just how far you've
come on your culinary leadership journey, Take part in the successful
Chef Mindset Challenge and download your scorecard at link.chefliferadio.comforward/mindset,
and the link is in the show notes. If you're ready to spark the
flame and reclaim your passion, purpose, and process, then let's
begin. Resilience. It's hard to define because it used to mean
something completely different and much more dangerous. It used
to mean strength and resolve rooted by purpose and able to withstand
massive pressure until it no longer can, and then, of course,
it shatters like concrete or big oak trees. Back in the day when
I opened up my very first restaurant in downtown Chicago as executive
sous chef, we spent about 6 weeks working about 75 to 80 hours
a week to get ready to open. After that 1st week that we were
open, things were moving so quickly, and the place was so slammed.
It took everything in my power just to be able to keep going.
We've heard it all before. Right? Suck it up sunshine. If you
can't handle the heat, maybe it's time to find another profession.
Stop acting like a delicate flower and toughen up. I've seen preschoolers
with more resilience than you. Do you want me to hold your hand
through every little task? You're either on my bus or you're out
walking. And most famously, I'm gonna come to your house tonight
and burn it to the ground. And in the morning, I'm gonna salt
the ground so nothing will ever grow there. Kitchen bro code for,
as it was for me, so it shall be for you. Shit rolls downhill,
buddy. In some kitchens, I found that shame is preferable to failure
because shame is shouldered alone when failure stains everyone
with the same brush. So there was no way I was gonna fail. After
about 2 weeks when we were open, the operations manager came through
the kitchen, and he saw me huddled down next to one of the stoves.
He patted me on the back. I stood up, and he said, hey. Listen,
Adam. I just wanna make sure that you understood that what you're
doing is seen and appreciated, and all your hard work really matters.
Just he nodded my head a little bit. As soon as he left, I turned
and walked into the little electric room that doubled as a kitchen
uniform storage and locker room. I broke down and started crying
for about 20, 30 minutes and not just like a little boohoo. These
were, like, huge heaving sobs because in that entire 6 weeks that
preceded that particular incident, I was doing everything I possibly
could in order just to hang on hang on for just one more moment,
just one more day because I figured all I needed to do was just
keep going. Be a good soldier. Keep going. One more step. Keep
going. One more shift. What I didn't realize is how close I was
to being burnt out, and that release of energy through my body
through crying was the only way that I knew to move that energy
out of my body because I felt in that moment, even while someone
was saying thank you, I felt like I was gonna shatter into a 1000000
pieces. I was brittle, broken, backed up, and ready to break.
The thing that's important to understand about burnout is that
it is a direct result of clinging to the old idea of what resilience
used to mean, that you're strong enough to be able to put up with
everything and anything. The reality is that even the biggest
boulder in the middle of a stream is gonna get whittled down to
just about nothing, and the stream will win out. Burnout is a
conflict of values between what you think is important and what
your employer thinks is important. That's what I used to think
resilience was. What I discovered through my process, my journey,
and through the wound to heal the pain is that no one, doesn't
matter if it's my mother or lover or my friend or enemy, my patron,
my fellow chef, nobody will ever fully understand or appreciate
how much of me I put into what I do for a living. I'm thinking
probably the same for you. I willingly chose all the intention,
reverence, and humility, all the physical, emotional, and spiritual
energy that I had put into everything I had done up until that
moment. I chose it. I had to take full responsibility for my experience
and the results and the lack thereof because I'm keenly aware
that I was choosing it at every moment. I admit that sometimes
I wasn't even aware of my motivations, but I was the one who decided
what to do and how to do it. So to look for someone else to fully
appreciate what I was doing as some type of pat on the back and
validation of who I was being in the moment was a fool's errand.
In that moment, felt like I could continue to go on, that my resilience
was somehow rewarded. But how could I ever expect anyone else
to know or appreciate what was solely mine and my power to give
to my craft and fraternity of brothers and sisters? Once I understood
that the one person who could value me or not, once freed from
that mental emotional stress, I was able to finally focus out
instead of inward giving others what I had once wanted and being
able to model mature professionalism so that my charges would
know what that looked like, what thought, felt, and acted. So
when they were ready to step into those clogs, they would know
how to embrace it and embody it for those who would follow them.
Now it's more accurate to say as the American Psychological Association
defines resilience, and a resilient mindset is the ability to
withstand adversity and bounce back from difficult life events.
In a word, it's flexible, being more bamboo and a lot less oak.
My friend and colleague, Kristen Marvin, uses a term to describe
resilience perfectly. She calls it mental fitness. You notice
she didn't say mental toughness. I wonder why. K. So how can I
cultivate resilience in the face of kitchen challenges? You can
do 3 things. Number 1 is you can practice mindfulness techniques,
deep breathing, visualization, stay grounded and centered during
stressful moments in the kitchen. Sometimes that might take a
pattern interrupt where you have to walk outside and just take
a deep breath on the back dock. Sometimes mindfulness means being
present to what there is to do in that particular moment. I do
this thing where I call it future projection where right before
I get on a call, right before I go out on a stage, right before
I walk into the kitchen, I take a moment and I talk to myself
about what that experience is gonna be like as a future projection
or a desire for a particular outcome, whether that's this conversation
is gonna go smoothly. I'm gonna know exactly what I need to say
in every moment. But just taking a moment and taking a deep breath
and focusing on that for a moment as opposed to letting my anxiety
or passion run away with me such that I'm not actually grounded
in that particular moment. Action item number 2, you can seek
support from mentors, colleagues, or professional coaches to gain
perspective, guidance, and encouragement when facing those challenges.
Very often, we think that we have to handle all this alone, wrestle
the problem to the ground until we come up with an answer, and
then finally come up and make a declaration. I'm telling you that
is the long road off a short pier. What you need to do is check-in
with others that have gone through the same experience or going
through the same experience and be very transparent, vulnerable,
and open with them such that you might be able to hear a different
perspective, something that's gonna actually pivot you away from
this one particular tact that you thought you were gonna take
and provide you another opportunity to deepen and think about
what it is that you're actually gonna do. And number 3, reflect
on past successes and remind yourself of your ability to overcome
the obstacles, fostering a sense of confidence and resilience
in your culinary journey. Thinking about the things that went
well for you or thinking about the challenges that you've overcome
can be a great way of, again, grounding yourself and understanding
that you do have the resilience to actually get through this particular
moment. Being more bamboo than oak is a great way of kind of buffeting
changes and realizing that as a read in the wind, you're always
gonna come back to that straightened position. One last little
tip about resilience is that it's important to understand that
when things are going rough, it's time to get back to the basics.
It's time to get back to humility. It's time to understand that
in any given circumstance, no matter how overwhelming it might
seem, it's time to get back to chopping wood and carrying water.
There's an old adage that says that as of the apprentice, I chopped
wood and I carried water, and as the master, I chopped wood and
carried water. No matter where you're at, there's what you think
there is to do, and then there's what there is to do. And sometimes
when things seem completely overwhelming, resilience comes down
to the small acts, the things that there are to do even in the
face of insurmountable obstacles or things that seem like, like,
I'll never be able to put up with it or to succeed against this.
It's as simple as what there is to do. Couple weeks ago, I was
wrestling with something in my head and I couldn't really talk
about it. And my wife asked me, like, what's going on? And I wouldn't
say anything. And one morning, I just walked up to the kitchen,
and I decided I was gonna pull myself up by my bootstraps metaphorically.
And on the way to the tea kettle, my wife whispers over her shoulder
to me, chop wood and carry water. I'm like, yeah. That's what
there is to do. Just chop wood and carry water and disassociate
myself from the expectation that anybody would understand or appreciate
or anything. It was divorcing myself from any attachment to an
outcome. Because in the end, all there is to do is what there
is to do. How about for your team? Leadership in the culinary
world is more about than just creating menus and managing inventory.
It's about inspiring your team and setting the tone for your kitchen
culture. Leaders must be adept at multitasking, handling the pressure
of a busy service, making quick decisions. Your leadership impacts
everything from food quality to customer satisfaction and staff
morale. Your role as a leader includes being a role model, providing
clear communication, guiding your staff through the industry's
demands. It's essential to show your team that you're willing
to roll up your sleeves and work alongside them them when necessary.
Leaders also recognize their team member strengths in delegating
tasks accordingly, which ensures efficiency and helps with career
advancement by fostering individual skills. Balancing firm guidance
with understanding and support is the key to a strong cohesive
brigade. And if you're looking for ways in which to foster more
resilience or to share that successful chef mindset with your
team, you start off by handling stress with composure, constructively
addressing conflicts, especially when your team is there. They
see your emotional intelligence in action, and they're probably
more inclined to follow suit. If you're freaking out or tripping
out in that particular moment, you gotta understand that everybody's
actually looking to you for emotional cues of how they should
react in similar situations. You're always being watched. It's
really important to be able to show others how to be cool under
pressure. I'm not talking about swallowing the crap that's happening
in the moment. But to be able to constructively address that conflict
in such a way that you gain consensus is an incredibly powerful
way to model that for your team. Regular team meetings. I say
this again and again. If you're not having a stand up right before
service, then you're missing an incredible opportunity, not only
to create a safe space. You can express concerns, but you can
also offer support, and you can allow others and have a voice
and to be heard. Everybody's a stakeholder, but you get to be
the decision maker. That doesn't necessarily mean that you don't
want to hear what others have to say. It's a great way of building
cohesion amongst your team, fostering emotional intelligence,
and building resilience within that team. And lastly, one of my
favorites is train and role play your staff. Role play is one
of the greatest tools that you can deploy while building resilience
because when things are happening in the kitchen, it's the first
time that someone's experienced it. There is an angry customer
or there is a server who's freaking out. If that's happening in
the regular course of service, it's very hard to try to steer
that that conflict or that situation into a successful outcome
without having the taken the time to role play with your staff.
You can role play with yourself in front of a mirror, but the
idea is to actually create the environment where which this might
happen, just actually watch them how they handled it, and then
to use that as a coaching moment. And that could be everything
from sliding a plate across the pass, trying to get somebody,
a rise out of somebody, but role play that shit out first so that
when it's happening in a live service, everybody knows how to
handle it with grace and composure. Does that make sense? Great.
Listen. I'm gonna leave it right there because I know it's a lot
to take in, but we're gonna be talking about this for the next
three episodes. This idea of what it's like to build a successful
chef mindset and the particular tenants or important assets that
build that up. So in the next several episodes, you're gonna be
hearing a lot more of this because it's my job, my honor, and
my privilege to support you on your way to culinary leadership
mastery. This is Chef Life Radio, your go to place, your home
for actionable intelligence and tips, tricks, and strategies for
success, satisfaction, and sanity in the culinary industry. That's
it for this episode. We'll catch you next week. Stay tall and
frosty, y'all. Join the Successful Chef Mindset Challenge in at
link.chefliferadio.comforward/mindset. Remember, cultivating a
successful chef mindset isn't just about what happens in the kitchen.
It's about embracing a mindset of growth, resilience, and positivity
that will elevate every aspect of your culinary journey. Let's
embark on this transformative journey together and unlock the
mindset of a true culinary champion.
That's it for this episode of Cheflife Radio. Here at Cheflife
Radio, we believe that working in a kitchen should be demanding.
It just shouldn't have to be demeaning. It should be hard. It
just doesn't have to be harsh. We believe that it's possible to
have more solidarity and less suck it up sunshine, more compassion,
less cutthroat island. We believe in more partnership and less
put up or shut up. More family and less fuck you. Stand tall and
frosty brothers and sisters, but consider for a moment, for all
the blood, sweat and effort you've put into what you do, at the
end of the day, it's just some stuff on a plate. None of it really
matters. It doesn't define you as a person or make you any more
special or less than anyone else. It's just a dance that we're
engaged in, so we might as well laugh and enjoy every bit of it.
Or didn't you know that the purpose of your life should be to enjoy it?
You just like it halfway up a love time. Humble. Goddamn. It's
Rory Fox. I don't live on now.
Visit the website at chef life radio dot com. Subscribe to the
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Be well and do good.